Big Mad.

Spoiler alert! I’m ’bout to talk some shit:

I hate how so many women I know feel like men ain’t shit is an unwritten law of nature. “Babies make men run. Fast.” was my mother’s relationship advice. Granted, she does not want me head over heels, pregnant, then heartbroken & single a couple months later. But.. when i turned 23, she had the same perspective. I should expect a man to leave me when I get pregnant & endure a pregnancy, birth, & having a newborn by myself. Of course, she’ll be willing to help. THEN he’ll “come around” after he sees that me & the baby are good without him. After the baby is born is when men realize. Realize what? You tell me. That’s just always where the sentence ended.

And THAT scenario is the best I can expect . He might marry me if he’s getting old & running out of options. Plenty of girls feel like they’re lucky if the man (or teenaged boy) shows up at the baby shower. They pride themselves on being “Baby Nunu’s Parents”. Girl bye. And don’t even get me started on these too damn long engagements. Got a house, child (or several) and numerous family events in the books and y’all still just playing house. Splitting the rent and acting like fucking him & washing his drawers will make him wake up one day and magically realize that you are the best he’s ever had and that you deserve to be crowned. It’s not about you at all. And never will be. It’s about the comfort you provide and the dominion you willingly live under. It’s about the fact you got mommy tummy and mommy titties. Y’all know each other bodies & he expects your menstrual cycle. Like, who else IS you gone be with at this point ? There’s so much you’ve invested. That’s YOUR man.

So you slave owner now, sis?

The lack of commitment is his choice & your improvised marriage contract. Don’t assume it’s because he can’t stop cheating. He don’t have to be stepping out on you! But he damn sure ain’t stepping in. And you’re okay with that because if you demand respect he might leave. If you want to be rewarded for your hard work, he may very well find another woman who’s okay with fucking him, splitting his bills, having his kids, and washing his drawers. After all, there are so many of them.

But shit, at least you got a man.